Every year, we write about the things we want to change, improve, and remove from our lives. People are hopeful, believing in new beginnings. And year after year, we tend to fail in achieving these unattainable goals we set for ourselves. I for one don’t believe in having these resolutions. It’s so attached to the idea of the New Year that even only after a few days or months passed, people have already given up or even forgotten about them. I guess we can say that resolutions only work when it’s within the proximity of the New Year. So for me, I don’t want to make a resolution. I rather make a promise to myself.
All my life, I’ve lived the life that others want me to. What I am now is what others have dictated to me as I was growing up. Do this. Get this program for College. Get this job. Go to this event. Come to this place. Watch this film. Read this book. Befriend that person. Don’t do this. Stop doing that. Don’t act like that. Be more like this. Countless times, I have done more things that others told me to do than what I really wanted to. Though I know their intention is well, I just feel like I am trapped in the life I don’t want for myself. I feel like a prisoner to this pre-conceived idea of who I should be, what I should do, and how I should do it. I never felt like I am my own person. I am not happy.
This year, I’m gonna do things my way. I want to be happy. I want to feel happy. I don’t need the validation of others when I know where I stand, when I know where my place is in this wild world of ours. I’m gonna live for myself. We’re so absorbed in impressing other people to gain their approval that we forget what matters the most, our own approval of ourselves.
I’ve lived the good life, and I just felt like that’s not what I want. I want to live the simple life. People pushed me too hard before not knowing I’m already happy with what I have. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s just not for me. I’m contented.
For 2018, I’m gonna promise myself to live my truth. Do what I want in my own pace. Live the life I want, and stop being concerned with a stranger’s opinions of me.